Below the Knee

G's 30th Birthday Shoe Party

2006-12-18T22:52:00.000-05:00

We threw G a shoe party! How fun is that? Who is totally jealous? The fabulous girls at ShoeFly (16 & U) provided the wine (and even champagne) and the hostesses with the mostess (S, T & N) were allowed to bring in chips and salsa (G's favorite) and cupcakes for the birthday girl! Seriously, does life get any better than girlfriends, shoes, wine, champagne and cupcakes? Just a little bit better, they also have the cutest (not to mention affordable) accessories too! I HEART ShoeFly and the girls who work there and birthday shoe parties and finally having someone to be 30 with me (well, ok for the next 3 weeks anyway).

While I very sadly did not get any shoes, lots of other girls did. G and N both got these adorable pumps that are also super sexy and comfortable! Tons of the shoes and ShoeFly are comfortable! Oh wait! And I almost forgot we got a discount too! Ok seriously...shoes, wine, discount, I'm pretty sure I have a new Mecca, move over DSW! OH AND, as if it could get better...ShoeFly is stumbling distance from my apartment!

ahhhh, pretty shoes in my comfort zone...I love my life!

Blast from the Past

2006-12-11T17:17:00.000-05:00

Remember when you were in the 3rd grade and your mom made you wear a dress with smocking on the top and scratchy wool tights and you hated it becuase you just wanted to wear your "play clothes" (remember when you had play clothes?) so you could play soccer with the boys at recess? Well this weekend I was so excited to see the wool tights just like I wore in 3rd grade in grown up sizes! I snatched them up and was even more thrilled to find that they have improved from back then and are now soft and comfortable and stay up! Yay! When I put them on with my cordoroy skirt I felt like I was transported back to the 3rd grade, I felt so fun! And the best part is I didn't have to look like I was in the 3rd grade becuase I put on my fun sassy boots and a cute top and there you go, I looked casual and hip and I was warm too! I feel I have found my inner child or something all with a pair of wool tights! I almost want to go find a Polly Flenders dress, some Buster Brown shoes and go couples skating at SkateLand with Chad Lomax!

My Perfect Turkey Day Outfit

2006-11-21T15:51:00.000-05:00

I am in LOVE with this new trendy, casual, but dressy enough cute look! It is the perfect Thanksgiving wear...short-ish skirt, sweater, tights and fuzzy boots! So cute, so sleek, so warm and fuzzy and yet not your usual jeans. I want to live in in. I want fun fuzzy boots for every outfit and sweaters to match them all and tights in all different patterns! And the best part, it is cute on everyone! I mean, maybe not your grandma, but pretty much anyone else, big small, young, mature. Last weekend I saw a little girl about 4 years old sporting my new favorite look and just wanted to squeeze the cuteness right out of her (which is saying alot for me, cuz usually I don't want much to do with 4 year olds)! And, dare I say it, this trend is even comfortable! Enjoy it while it lasts! I hope it it here to stay cuz I am already planning a x-mas version of the outfit as we speak!

Happy Turkey Day and more importantly, even happier day after Thanksgiving super sales shopping day!

I Spy with My Little Eye

2006-11-15T11:06:00.000-05:00

This morning on my way to work I experienced a rollercoaster of emotions, pain, relief, horror, delight, you name it, I felt it all in the matter of a half hour.

My day began around 4am when I woke up with a terrible migrain (not the pain I speak of above) so by the time 8am rolled around, I had been up twice taking medicine and trying all of my home remidies. Meaning that when I finally got out of bed for good I was already exhausted and had little energy to put into my outfit. So I threw on some solid basics and some cute flats I rarely wear. As I stepped onto the street I was reminded why I rarely wear these adorable flats...they Kill (emotion = pain)! This helped me make up my mind to take the bus instead of walking (well that and the fact that the migraine was already making me a half hour late). I painfully limped the 2 blocks to the bus stop and dug around in my bag for an extra pair of shoes or anything I might find in there to help my already sore feet (yes, my bag is so big that I might have some shoes in there and not know it, back off!). I did not find extra shoes, but did find these heel grip things I'd picked up at CVS recently. I bought them becuase I had a pair of shoes that had stretched out and I thought inserting these things might help them stay on my feet. I eagerly tore open the package and inserted the little sticky pads onto the backs of my shoes. I cautiously put my feet back in them and stood up and the heavens seemed to open up and angels sang...ahhhhhhhhhhh (emotion = relief). Not only do these neat-O little pads (which cost me like $3 (if that) keep your shoes on your feet and provide a little padding, they prevent the heels from moving around and therefore stops your shoes from making blisters on your heels! GENIOUS!

As I'm strutting up and down the street feeling as if I've found the promise land (in the form of heel grips) I look up the street to see if the bus is coming...it is not, but what was coming was a tall, thin woman in a black trench coat, black panty hose and a pair bright orange crocks (emotion = horror)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG, she was already completely noticable being a lovely, tall, thin model type woman but then she went and took crocks to a whole new level of grotesque by pairing them with her black panty hose! Ug, I can't talk about it anymore, it is too upsetting, not to mention, drug me out of my heel grip enduced euphoria!

Luckily I quickly turned away so that she didn't see the look of horror on my face and kick my butt (emotion I forgot to mention = fear). And as I turned away my eyes fell upon a girl walking from the other direction. I actually have no idea what was going on above her waist becuase I was so drawn to what was going on below the knee. This adorable girl (well I'll assume the rest of her was adorable) had on a satin wine, purple and black diamond skirt with opaque black tights and little velvet, wine colored flats (emotion = delight)! OMG SO CUTE! I just wanted to run after her, ask her to be my friend, tell her how cute she looked and find out where she got her shoes. They were so festive, they would look so good with a pair of black skinny velvet pants for the holidays! Actually I was picturing the whole outfit, black velvet skinny pants and wine colored shoes on the tall, thin model type in the crocks when the bus came and I had to move on from my fantasy.

Ah well, at least two good things came out of my bad start to my morning...I HEART heel grips and my new mission to find the velvet wine colored flats. :)

I HATE White Tennis Shoes

2006-11-10T14:39:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry, I just do. I know there is nothing wrong with them, that they can be found in most people's closets, and that everyone thinks "hey, they're neutral", but I just despise them!

Top 10 Reasons I Hate White Tennis Shoes:

you draw the attention right to your feet with your glaring white, clunky tennis shoes and if you are going to draw attention to your feet you want to have on something fabulous.
there are so many other tennis shoe options out there now, there is no need to go for the boring white, clunky tennis shoe
grey, tan, olive, blue, all can serve as a neutrals, they don't need to be white for them to go with everything
wear them a few times and now they are no longer glaringly white, now they are just noticiably dirty, which is why you should have gone ahead and bought grey anyway
you look like a nurse (not offense to nurses, but if you aren't working in a hospital, do you want to look like you are?)
they have no character
they are so anticeptic
they're so...Run DMC or something (not that I don't love me some Run DMC, cuz I do!), so early '90's.
white...november...enough said
THEY ARE JUST NOT CUTE!

These Stilettos Are Made For Voting

2006-11-07T18:10:00.000-05:00

And that's just what they did! These are the pretty shoes I chose to vote in today, but I don't care what shoes you wear to the polls, just put 'em on and get out there and VOTE!

Fall Back

2006-11-03T13:23:00.000-05:00

If typing had an equivalant to whispering that is what I would be doing right now. Becuase today's offender walks among us. She is right here in my office. She is my very own intern! Clearly it is time to move on from mentoring her in politics and begin her fashion education. Because girlfriend (who is actually quite fashionable in general) is wearing a sweater, a scarf and wait for it, are you ready, yes...flip flops! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She's a smart girl, she's a cute girl, how in the world has she not figured it out that if it is cold enough to not only wear a sweater, but a scarf indoors, then it is too freaking cold to wear flip flops. Here's an idea...I bet if she had on appropriate foot attire for the season she would not need to wear her scarf in the office.

If I've said it once I've said it a million times. Yes, I know they are comfortable, but again, so are my leopard print fuzzy slippers, but I don't wear them to work! Comfort is not an excuse! My cute, brown, suede flats with little sequins on them are not only adorable, but comfortable and get this, appropriate for the season! It is November, I just got back from CVS and the x-mas candy was out, it is 34 degrees - all very good signs that it is no ok to wear flip flops anymore (just incase her sweater and scarf were not enough of an indicator)!

I'm sure there are people who feel I'm being very mean spirited and will say something like "well maybe she isn't cold in flip flops". Whatever! Even if she isn't cold, that is only one factor to this faux pas. It is no longer flip flop season. Everyone would agree it was inappropriate if she were walking around in linen or a sundress.

I know it is hard, we all love our flip flops, we all mourn the end of summer, sunshine and BBQs. But we must come to grips with the fact that you MUST put away them away. There time has passed. We will miss you dear flip flops, you were good to us all summer, but the time has come for us to move on, we must pay attention to our knee high boots now. All your shoes deserve to be shown a little love. Goodbye flip flops, until next summer...

Pete Peeve Part 2

2006-10-30T10:50:00.000-05:00

I do not know how people are unaware of this...but it is clear that people either don't care, don't pay attention or just don't know! I am here to tell everyone, please pass it on.

Sometimes when you buy a suit, a jacket, or a skirt there are such things as vents, slits and pleats. Often, these vents, slits and pleats are sewn together with two white pieces of thread, usually forming an X. This is to help the item keep its shape in the store. Here is the key...

WHEN YOU GET HOME, YOU MUST REMOVE THE WHITE THREAD FROM YOUR SLITS, PLEATS AND VENTS!

I am at a loss for how people do not know this, but apparently they don't because at least once a week I am walking behind someone who has not cut the white thread out of their jacket, suit or skirt. If it is someone, say who has walked into my office, I just tell them to stand still and cut it off for them. But if I'm walking down L Street, I am always torn...can I point it out? Is it rude? Helpful? Do they know it is there? Do they know you are supposed to remove it and they forgot or didn't notice or what?

It is just like the tag people, before you put on new clothes I know you make sure there isn't a long sticker that says size 6 six 6 size 6 size 6 size 6 size 6 running all the way down your leg. When you do that, also make sure there is not a X sewn with thread holding any slits, pleats or vents together! Please. And now go spread the word!

Pet Peeves

2006-10-20T11:29:00.000-04:00

I suppose it isn't a hard and fast fashion rule, but regardles, it is one of my pet peves and I just spotted it for the first time this fall...light colored skirt (her's was pale grey) and black tights! UG! I hate it! Again, maybe it isn't a rule and is just one of those things I dislike and everyone else accepts, like black and chocolate brown together, but in my opinion, it looks terrible! I think that black tights are to be worn with a black skirt and black or very dark shoes. The point of dark colors is to extend the line of your body, meaning make your legs look longer! When you break everything into different color blocks, all I'm going to focus in on is one block of color, probably your calfs. My point is, this is not flattering, not matter how hot your calves may be.

This leads to another pet peve, still with black tights...I have yet to see it this year, but it's still early; black tights and contrasting shoes - another HUGE NO NO in my book! And possibly the worst possible thing I hate to see paired with black tights.....red! Ah!!!!!!!!! There is just nothing more severe and '80s (not in a good way) looking than a red suit and red shoes with black tights! This particular combination is a favorite on Capitol Hill. If you are going to wear a red suit and black tights, even if you have on black shoes (but whatever, the girls who wear a red suit and black tights are obviously not going to wear black shoes, they are in this for the BIG impact, they are going to wear a contrasting shoe!) then you might as well bring out the shoulder pads baby! On second thought, if you have a red suit in your closet, pad those shoulders, tease your hair and put on some black tights and you've got yourself a Halloween costume! You're a 1982 Capitol Hill staffer! Awesome!

So I'm just going to offer my two cents, just incase the girl in the light grey skirt is reading. If you are going to wear opaque black tights, wear a black skirt and a dark colored shoe as well. I know grey skirt girl and red suit girl are both exclaiming "well then what do I wear with my grey skirt and red suit in the winter?" I don't know, knee high boots? Just NOT black tights! Or tan panty hose for that matter (but don't wear those with anything)!

Confessions of a Short Girl

2006-10-11T16:22:00.000-04:00

I admit it, I am terribly, ugly, green with envy of those girls whose pants fall at exactly the right length with all of their shoes! How do they do it? Are all these girls the same height? You know how when you go to the shoe store and most of the display shoes are a 6 or 7? Are all pant lengths based upon a certain height of girl? If so, how tall is that girl?

Like most girls (I would imagine) I have jeans I wear with heels and jeans I can wear with flats. But even my jeans that I can wear with flats still scrunch up a little at the bottom. And as for other pants, well they are all different lengths, some I have to wear with super high heels, some I have to wear with really low heels, some I can wear with average heels and a pair or two that have to be worn with flats. But regardless, very rarely do my pants fall at that perfect level, right at the bottom of your heel on flats or an inch above the ground with my heels. And even if these perfect pant length girls are getting all of their pants hemmed to the perfect length, do they only have one pair of shoes, or are all of their heels the same height? Are they shopping for pants at a secret store I don't know about or can't afford? Is there actually a designer out there that makes women's pants with an inseam and they are actually cute and semi-affordable? Can't be, one of the fashion magazines would certainly of spilled this secret jewel if it existed, right?!

And does having your pants fall at the perfect length mean that when you walk down the stairs your heels don't get caught in the hem and cause you to fall down the stairs? Or, does it allow them to walk home in the rain without the hem of their pants soaking up all the water all the way up to their knees? What about fraying the bottom of their jeans...do they not have holes in the hem of their jeans from walking on them? What other advantages do these perfect pant length girls have?

I bet they all have boyfriends (or girlfriends), fabulous apartments they own in Dupont Circle and a pink vespa to ride to their fancy jobs! :(

How Many Inches is Too Many?

2006-09-26T11:55:00.000-04:00

3-4 inches…Perfect
Any less or any more is not acceptable!

That girl with the 7 inches all the way to her knees…is she going to muck out her horses stall? Probably not, huh?

Wait, what did you think I was talking about? Your jeans people, cuffing your jean!

And her, with the ½ inch cuff above her shoes…it is not 1984 girlfriend, it is a trend!

And him, wait, can men cuff their jeans? Even the appropriate 3-4 inches? Debatable. I’d say don’t try it unless you are gay.

The point is, that the big cuff on jeans is a trend that has stuck around a little longer than I personally expected. Therefore, by now, everyone should understand how it works. Because we are cuffing our jeans again does not mean that it is ok to cuff them as a matter of practicality! It is a fashion statement. The point being to crop your jeans, give your regular old jeans an exaggerated fun look. It is not so that your jeans don’t drag on the ground!

Some rules must be followed here or this trend, like most, can look ridiculous. Like those of you with your cuff all the way to your knees...I know, I know, you’re different, you’re edgy, you don’t want to look like everyone else. Ok, except you do, or you wouldn’t be following the trend by taking it to extremes, you’d be wearing flannel pajama bottoms and doc martens or something.

The cuff should be 3-4 inches and should crop your jeans above your ankles, mid calf. Now if your jeans are super long and the 3-4 inches doesn’t cut it, then that does not mean cuff them to your knees and it doesn’t mean cuff them the 3-4 inches but they are now regular length…just don’t cuff those jeans. Not all jeans are cuff-able (yes, maybe I maybe up that word)!

Or those of you with your ½ inch cuff because your jeans are too long…that isn’t the point here. Either a.) wear higher heels, b.) buy jeans with an inseam or c.) cuff your jeans the appropriate 3-4 inches and look fashionable.

This winter, we will wear the trend a little differently, with boots, like your winter capris. But please, please, please, cuff with caution!

Tights are Tight!

2006-09-21T10:36:00.000-04:00

It's cold...it's hot
Open-toe shoes v. closed-toe
Boots or no boots...
Bare legs or tights...

What is a girl to do with her legs and toes in this very uncertain and confusing fashion season? On our walk to work in the mornings it is a chilly 60 degrees, by the time we go grab some lunch it is a lovely 72, when we go into happy hour it is close to 80 and by the time we leave it is back down to 60. How in the world does one stay warm or cool enough and still look great? I'll admit, I'm confused as the rest of you as I stand in my closet every morning trying to find that just right outfit and the shoes to go with it. But there are a few things I'm pretty certain of, like the girl my friend saw in her white linen skirt, sleevless shirt, bare legs and turquoise open toe kitten heels yesterday morning was WRONG WRONG WRONG! But for the rest of us hovering in-between seasons here are the rules I'm following right now...

1. Knee hight boots are now acceptable, but ONLY with bare legs for right now (obviously this will change later in the season)

2. Bare legs with your skirt are acceptable still, but preferably with close-toed shoes (mind you, this does not pertain to my friend in AZ and maybe we can push things up a little for my friends in MI)

3. The leggings and mini skirt trend is perfect for right now if you are daring enough to pull it off. Keep in mind, the leggigs MUST only come 3/4 of the way down your leg, NOT all the way to your ankle! Also, this looks best on girls with long, thin legs and can only be worn with flats (check out the cute suggestions in my Fall Must Haves)

4. Open-toe shoes are still ok on a nice day, but preferably with pants.

5. Tights are ok, but NOT with your knee high boots yet. Also, they must be light, thin tights, none of these wool tights yet (as cute as they are going to be later in the winter, don't rush it).

6. If you are going to wear tights, fashion tights are the way to go, they come in so many cute, subtle patterns that can be worn with most anything, including your peep toes as long as you can't see a seam (I'm talking really barely a peep here, not open-toed shoes, like a peep only big enough for your big toe)!

7. Panty hose are no longer a necessary evil! They are ugly, unflattering and so very very unsexy and rarely does anyone get the color right! With so many other options out there, throw away the panty hose and get some opaque tights or tight fishnets (not the loose huge holed kind, those are for halloween and street walkers)!

Who knew I had so much to say about tights (not me until my friend requested a tights posting), but now that I'm writing, I feel I have much more to say. This may be a two parter or more! For example, now that I'm thinking about tights I'm reminded of one of my biggest pet peves...a red skirt and black tights!!!!!!!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! Or black tights and a light colored shoe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my gosh the evils I have to discuss here...What do you see that drives you crazy below the knee?

My Must Have Shoes for Fall

2006-09-12T22:19:00.000-04:00

There is a chill in the air and I find myself suddenly staring at the shelves of shoes in my closet feeling as if none of them are right. Well we all know what that means, I'm ready for fall shopping! Yay! Here are my picks for my must have shoes of the season.

1. A peep-toe is an excellent transitional shoe for summer to fall wear. This particular shoe, besides being absolutely adorable and sexy all at the same time, also combines two additional fabulous fall trends...animal print and a wedge heel. These are going to look so so so so cute with a pencil skirt and a red blouse!

2. A classic pump is a must for all seasons and this one is about as classic as it gets and as affordable! Payless has followed in the footsteps of Target and hired a high end designer, Laura Poretsky, formerly of Ralph Lauren and now with her own label, Abaete. This fabulous find is going to be my very first fall shoe purchase at just $25! And if this grown up version isn't your style, Poretsky has also designed a super sassy pair of round-toe mary janes for $17.99! Who can say BOGO? I'm totally buying them both!

3. Cowboy boots (and boots in general) are going to be even bigger this fall than last. This year we are going to wear them over our jeans, under them, with skirts and slacks, you name it. This pair from Nine West is like cowboy boots taken up 3 notches! They're red patent with pointy toes and a chain buckle details. They are so hot I feel like they are going to take my wildness up 3 notches! These make me jump up and down and clap my hands because I just can't wait to own them!

4. Shoe myth...flats are boring, unsexy, uncute, for old people or tall people. Flats are for everyone this fall and they are cuter than ever! This fun little pair is perfect. They are made a little sexier in a metallic shade of gold, but can be worn to the office, with a skirt, with jeans, to the bar. They are so versatile and also come in silver and non-metallic (which are less fun). I love the bow detail that makes them a little different from your everyday ballet flat.

5. Finally, fashion sneakers are the final fall must have. They are great for walking to work, milling around on the weekend, shopping, basically doing whatever it is you need to do in "practical" shoes. Please Note: I do not in general approve of practical shoes, only shoes that are cute and just so happen to also be practical. This adorable pair is cute and probably comfortable and brown and pink (yet another fab fall combo).

You are now armed with your fall fashion musts from the shoe department. Go forth and shop (just don't buy these exact shoes if you hang out with me often).

The Most Important Man in my Life

2006-09-11T10:46:00.000-04:00

Well all know what I’m talking about, we might not know what to call it and many of you ignore it all together…but I must call attention to that little black, plastic nubbin thing on the bottom of our heels. If you own a pair of heels and you live, work or party in the city, at some point you are bound to end up walking some uncomfortable distance in your favorite heels. I know that some man is reading this right now and thinking “whatever, why do women complain when they can wear tennis shoes to walk to work, etc.”…well the wearing of tennis shoes to walk to work is a whole other subject, but there are instances in which it is just not possible to put on the “walking shoes”. If you live in the burbs and are coming in via metro on the weekend there is no way a woman can cram an extra pair of shoes in her teeny little clutch and carrying a big ole bag is not conducive to dancing. Or if you have to walk to a meeting for work, you can’t show up and change your shoes…so not professional. And therefore, we end up wearing down that little black nubbin thing put there to protect our heels from looking like we allow the dog to use them as a chew toy.

Because I have seen many of you walking around town with the little black nubbin torn off of your heels or heard you coming down the street as the metal drags along the sidewalk like nails on a chalkboard, it has become apparent to me that some of you are either:

oblivious to the necessity of the little black, plastic nubbin
love your shoes too much to get rid of them but didn’t pay enough to fix them
have never heard of a cobbler

Those of you who ignore the little black nubbin please pay close attention…IT IS THERE FOR A REASON! You would not go out with a hole in your shirt or a tear in your skirt, so why in the world would you go out with your shoes broken? The lack of the little black nubbin makes your shoes look like crap. And you must think nobody notices, but we do!

For those of you who know the nubbin is gone and are just broken hearted about getting rid of your favorite heels, but only paid $25 for them and therefore feel it is not worth it to pay someone to fix them…suck it up. One way or the other, you’ve got to do something because wearing them as it is not an option. If you only paid $25 for them, then you’ve gotten your wear out of them, they’ve served you well and you can buy another pair. Or, if you really and truly love them that much then they are indeed worth fixing, so do it!

And for those of you who have never heard of a cobbler (yes, I have met these people, they exist), please allow me to introduce you to the most important man in my life…my cobblers (wait, how come I’ve never met a female cobbler?...hum, something to examine later). The cobbler is the man who fixes shoes. He is amazing! Actually, they are amazing, I personally have two, one to fix my not so expensive shoes that just need the little black nubbin replaced and one for my most loved, expensive shoes that need a make-over. Either way, my expensive cobbler or my everyday cobbler, neither are terribly expensive. The replacing of a nubbin, $8 - $12 (NOTE: you must bring both shoes, even if only one is missing the nubbin, otherwise, they’ll be unbalanced), or a whole over-haul is maybe $25. I have broken off an entire heel before, yes, like tore it off from the very top) and my cobbler not only replaced my heel, but my boots came back to me looking and feeling better than when I turned them in! Cobblers can also replace zippers, fix scuffs (usually for free), even resize your shoes! Seriously, besides people related to me, my relationship with my cobbler is my longest standing and most functional relationship I’ve had with a man! Find yourself a cobbler and maybe you can start to feel good about men again and you can stop walking around ruining your perfectly good shoes!

p.s. all the above can also be applied to a tailor. Do not walk around with your hem falling out, taped up or safety pinned, find a tailor (usually there is one at your dry cleaners) and pay them the $8 to fix your hem. It is worth it girls, it is one less margarita in order to looked pulled together!

Rain ruins a Friday

2006-09-01T14:08:00.000-04:00

Getting caught in the rain wearing flip flops can ruin my entire day and make me want to go home, put on pajamas, order pizza and ice cream and watch reality television all night :(

Falling for Fall

2006-08-31T13:16:00.000-04:00

This morning I witnessed my first glimpse of Fall-itis…when perfectly fashionable and cute girls “Fall” pretty to tiring of their summer clothes and jump the gun on their new Fall wardrobe. I saw a girl in layered white blouse/black sweater combo with twill capris and knee high boots! I saw another woman in lovely tasseled suede pumps. Both shoes were adorable, but their attempts at being fashion forward were just a bit too forward for the season!

It is still August people! And just because we’ve been spared from our usual sweltering heat and have a nice cool day does not mean the DC summer is over. I know the kids are back in school, Congress is back in session and the stores are full of beautiful Fall wares, but that is not an excuse to pull out the knee high boots, suedes and sweaters!

Here is what I am guessing happened to these otherwise chic chicas…earlier this summer they took advantage of the Nordstrom sale and now have closets full of fun, new Fall clothes and shoes that they are dying to wear. And they are SO tired of wearing the same summer clothes they’ve been wearing for the past 3 months. Plus they were kinda of having a fat day and hadn’t had a pedicure, so felt the need to wear more fabric and cover up the toes. As they were staring at their closets, knowing better than to go for the suede and the boots they heard the weather report saying it was going to be a cool rainy day and they thought “Fall weather, just the excuse I need to wear my hot new boots!” WRONG!

I appreciate the need to do whatever you have to in order to feel cute on an ugly, rainy day (I personally carry a huge bag with a curling iron, extra shoes, a make up bag, styling gel, mouse and bobby pins…just incase), but pulling out the Fall wardrobe too soon is not the way to deal with it ladies.

Suggestions:

mix up your wardrobe by putting things together that you wouldn’t normally have thought of or don’t automatically pair together.
it is labor day weekend, EVERYONE is having a sale. Buy yourself a pair of super on sale summer shoes you can be excited about wearing for the next 4 weeks.
get your hair cut…I don’t know, it always makes me feel better about everything
get some new accessories to make your old outfits feel new and fresh
if you MUST jump the gun on the Fall stuff, make it your make-up. Bring out the Fall colors in your eyes, not on your feet!
My fail proof fix…don’t shop the season until you can wear it. I need instant gratification and buying something I can’t wear right away brings me almost no joy, so just resist the temptation and then at your first real sign of the season, shop til you drop

It is tough to go back to the tired old summer clothes once you’ve gotten out all the cute fall outfits you forgot about, so don’t do it. I predict that we’ve got more humidity in our future and another month of flip flop season. I know you don’t want to be that girl sitting at the waterfront drinking a margarita in your knee high boots and tweed skirt, drunk because you are forced to continue drinking in order to stay remotely cool in your Fall outfit!

Sidewalk Grate Etiquette

2006-08-28T17:13:00.000-04:00

Dear Gentlemen who we are forced to share the sidewalks with everyday, this is a public service announcement on sidewalk grate etiquette. I know you didn’t realize there was such a thing, but there is, so pay attention!

Allow me to set the scene…you are walking to work minding your own business when you spot this cute girl walking towards you. As you are mentally patting yourself on the back for taking this particular route this morning and trying to decide how to best get her attention, the cute girl suddenly stops in her tracks. So you stop too, thinking “damn, I’m good, I just stopped this girl cold I’m so hot”. Cute girl continues to stare at you as you smile at her for a moment. She’s not smiling back; actually, she looks kinda annoyed. So now you are thinking “what are you doing you crazy chick…walk”!

Now I want to give you all the credit you deserve and assume you are smart enough to figure this out. And even if you can’t figure it out yourselves, I’d assume that one of you has had a girlfriend or two and could pass on the knowledge, but apparently not.

In the process of checking out the woman you now think is crazy, I know you noticed (and admired) her 3 inch high stilettos. I know this because if I were to take off my hard core feminist hat for just a moment, I’d admit that this is part of the reason we wear these beautiful torture devices...to get you to notice us. But did you notice the huge silver grate below the stilettos? Well, guess what…when we walk over these grates in our beautiful torture devices our heels get stuck in the slats and tear up our shoes! We yelp, trip, sometimes fall and are in general not at all happy about our now eaten up shoes that just a few seconds ago were about to get us a date with you!

What you should do tomorrow when you encounter this same scenario...either step to the side, allowing the young lady in the pretty shoes to walk on the sidewalk or you yourself walk on the grate in your sensible shoes that won’t get caught, so that she doesn’t have to. Men, there are very few good ones of you out there anymore and a thoughtful gesture like walking on the grate so that we don’t have to will give you one high stiletto heel up on the competition!

A Bunch of "Croc"

2006-08-24T13:28:00.000-04:00

You…20 something sitting on the fountain in Dupont Circle… I’ll assume you live in the city…and since you live in the city, I can also assume you do not have a garden. Yes, of course it is possible you have a small bathroom rug size plot in your front “yard” or that you are part of one of those shared garden areas, but unlikely. And since you are sitting in the middle of the circle chatting, I’m going to assume you are not on your way to your garden compound thing if you are by chance part of that community.

You…Young family walking down 16th Street…I’m going to assume you are tourists on your way to check out the White House and not on your way to gardening as a family activity. I’m also going to assume that the 8 year old little boy and the 6 year old little girl are not big into gardening even if you do happen to be the family gardeners for the Rose Garden on some odd chance.

You…Professional walking down K Street at 9:00am on a Wednesday morning….I am going to assume you are on your way to work. And because you are on K Street, I am going to assume you do not work in a garden, but in a professional office environment. But even if I’m wrong and you actually work in a restaurant or a gym or day care center or are even one of those people who stand around in the yellow jackets and give tourists directions, I’m still pretty sure you do not work in a garden.

So…assuming that NONE of you folks are gardening, why in the world do insist on wearing those terribly ugly, plastic and often florescent colored GARDENING SHOES? Granted, some marketing genius poked some holes in the tops of your basic gardening shoe and called them “Crocs” but they are still gardening shoes people, made to work in the garden, get muddy and wet, NOT to wear to Lauriol Plaza for dinner, to the bar on the weekend or even to walk to work!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, they’re comfortable…so is my nightgown, you don’t see me wearing it to work, the bar or out to dinner do you? No because it is to sleep in, just like “Crocs” are for gardening in…get it yet? Are we catching on? No? Now you are going to tell me you paid $50 for them at Nordstrom, so they must be hip and in, plus everyone else is wearing them, so clearly I’m the one in the wrong here. A quick Google search will show you that you can still pay $50 for plenty of other “comfortable” trends of the past that I’m sure we can all agree were fashion faux pas: the stirrup pant, the parachute pant, moon boots and sweater dresses!

So please put on some real shoes folks, even revert to last summer’s terrible trend of your mini skirt and your Uggs, whatever, just put something less ridiculous and less offensive on your feet…preferably something that is actually made to wear walking down the street!